Nike Forearm Shievers

scars

Allright.. I might be a bit philosophical today because I lay in bed and and I stared at my finger where I have this scar.

"funny thing about scars. They're always there. Doesn't mean they haven't healed..

It happened when I was in the fifth or sixth grade, I was about 12. And we had a subject called "handicraft". Everybody had to bring a carpet knife and everybody brought these yellow or red plastic things were you could push the blade higher and break the blade off so that the new blade was sharper..
However my mum gave me this small and silver carpet knife and she told me to be extra careful with it, 'cause it was very sharp. It looked very different from the others, simply because it was more expensive, I think.

On my way home my FRIENDS made fun of me. They claimed that I didn't bring a carpet knife and they annoyed me so much I couldn't take it anymore, I took the knife out and showed them and I accidentally cut myself with it.

I bled so much, gladly I was only a street away from home and I ran there, crying and bleeding..
I still wear this scar and I wonder what it means to me?

Maybe I never really had friends?
What exactly is a friend?

A "friend" of mine once told me that there is nothing like real friendship, only "purpose-relationships" (Zweckbeziehungen). People get together because they need something from another and if that purpose is gone the friendship gets lost as well..

Maybe he is right, I never really could find arguments against it.